Thursday, October 14, 2010

... Every Single Day I'll Be Missin You

Well, I just finished reading mommy's letter to you. It is so amazing how she can put her felings into words. I love your mommy so very much, she is an amazing woman, and awesome mom!

Lei... You are suppose to still be here with us. I miss you so much. There is not a day that goes by that I dont think of you, think of the what if's, think of the how come's, the why's, and most of all that day when I finallt get to see you again. I miss what we miss every single day without you here. Everytime I see a post or hear someone talk about their kids being so smart, or so good at school, I get jelous. Me and your mommy both looked forward to so many things that we are not going to get to experience now. School functions, singing at church, trips, watching you grow into a beautiful woman. I wish I had the answers, I wish I knew what to say.

Mommy brought home your footprints and handprints in a sadow box the other day and it broke my heart. Just to see the imprints and to know that's it. I'm sorry, I know that it is selfish of me to want you here, but just know that my life will never be the same, never be complete. I know that you are having such an awesome time.We had some bracelets made in your memory. You would love them. They are yellow and pink, and we even got one for Mylea too. Mr. Steven did an awesome job on them. We are trying to sell some so that we can give kids the opportunity to be envoled in everything church and go on trips that they cant afford. Seeing how you LOVED church and awanas, we think it is a perfect fit.

Momma, Mylea, and me went on a walk the other day. When we got to the loop, we let Mylea get out and walk. She was "super fast". To tell you the truth though, it was bitter sweet. I remeber the last time we all went for a walk, we would race, and you always won. You tried not to step on the pine needles. Its so hard to see Mylea grow up witout you. You were always there with each other side by side. Alot of who Mylea is, is because of You. You taught her so much. Thank you for being a great big sister.

We learned that the women's ministry was wanting to put a "prayer bench" outside of the church in your memory. We got to see a picture of it last Sunday and it looked good. Just another of the many ways that your Lifesong Sings. They were going to take an offereing to raise the money, but to our surprise, there was a couple in the church that wanted to pay for the whole thing. Simply amazing!

Just like momma said, I feel bad for be able to live life without you. Please dont ever think for a minute that we have forgot you. As much as it hurts every single day, and as much as it stinks every single day, we have to go on. You want us to go on, you want us to be happy.

Love you, Miss You, CUWIGT

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